Suburbia Vice-Squad
"We're here patrolling the south end of Lincoln Avenue...looking for pushers...we have to keep the neighborhood safe. We've had a few leads from some neighborhood kids that there's one in the area, right, Reggie?"
"Hold on, Steve...look."
Reggie points to a kid who folded up a cardboard sign reading "Kool-Aid 5 cents" and began walking briskly down the sidewalk, sign under his arm and cooler in his other hand.
Siren blares briefly.
"Where ya goin' Billy?" asks Steve.
"None of your business, cop. I'm mindin' mine."
"Really...you been pushin' today, Billy?" asks Reggie.
"Hey, I'm a BUSINESS MAN! I don't need to put up with this crap!"
"We hear you've been sellin' the 'HARD' stuff, Billy."
"Look, man. I don't know where you heard that, but it ain't true...alright!"
"Yeah...well, what's in the cooler, Billy!" says Steve as he snatches the Igloo from the 10 yr. old child.
He searches it.
"Well, well, well..." says Steve..."What have we here..." as he pulls out a Ziploc bag filled with ice cube shaped frozen Kool-Aid with little toothpicks stuck in them.
"THAT'S MEDICINAL! I just had my tonsils out, man!" cried Billy.
"Right..."
"Hey, c'mon, man! What you want from me?" pleaded Billy.
"Well, we're not after the pushers, Billy...we want the suppliers...what can you give us..."
"Man..."
Later...in the patrol car...
"This is our lucky day. Billy just turned evidence against his friend Tommy and his mom Mrs. Johanson. We've been after Mrs. Johanson for years...every time we catch one of her kids...they'd clam up...not tell us anything...afraid of getting grounded. BUT, we've GOT her this time."
"Yeah," said Steve "We called it in...they're in the process of raiding it as we speak...we'll go by and see what they've got..."
Later...at the Johanson home.
"Looky here..." said Reggie...
"Yeah...awful, isn't it?" says the SWAT member. "We've got toothpicks...plastic wrap...about a dozen ice trays...and a Kenmore fridge...yep...this WAS a rock house."
"Not anymore," says Steve.
"Hey! You can't do this! I'm a taxpayer!" says Mrs. Johanson.
"Care to explain how your taxpaying ways led to this!" said the detective as he held up a tray of freshly frozen Kool-Aid.
"That's not mine, officer! I'm just holdin' it for some guy!" says Mrs. Johanson.
"Get her outta here...hey, were you the two who got the guy who'll turn evidence?"
"Yes, sir!" said Steve.
"Better put him in custody for safe keeping...we didn't get Tommy. Last we heard...he was saying he'll get Billy next week beside the jungle gym. We can't let that happen or let him find out about it."
"That usually happens when things like this go bad. This was a big operation."
"Yeah...enough sugar-coated sweetness to rot the teeth of every kid in the neighborhood."
"How much would you say, detective?"
"A street value of anywhere between seven dollars to eight dollars and thirty-five cents."
Steve and Reggie whistle.
Later...back in the patrol car...
"That sure is a lot of 'hard' stuff that won't be on the streets of suburbia."
"Yeah, Steve. This is why we do this job. I think about all the kids out there with red or purple stained tongues and a pocket of toothpicks and I think...'I'm doin' it for them. I'm doin' it for them.'"
Current Mood: Marsupial Beligerance - "It's my pouch, you JERK!"
Current Music: "Bad Boys...what indeed shall you do?"
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